if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
