It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
