But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Randomize
