don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
