I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
MIDGETS
????
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
