i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
