I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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