I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Randomize
