Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize