i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Found your dick twin last night
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
