i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
