they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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