HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
