why didn't you poke me back
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
