maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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