so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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