her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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