It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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