hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
