I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Randomize
