So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
