Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
our cab driver is having phone sex.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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