AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
