it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
is that a dick in a sweater?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
