It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize