He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
