It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
