Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize