I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I have already put on my inside pants.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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