we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
