I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
