I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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