take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Randomize