but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
