I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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