I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I love you. Go after that dick
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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