I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
