drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize