9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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