i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize