i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
