Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Randomize
