when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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