So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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