I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
