did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
