susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
