You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
