Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Randomize
