i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
