oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize