you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize